I Am A Vessel

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And now we wait! I had a 3-day transfer of two 8-cell top grade embryos on Saturday morning. I felt really good about it to the point that I was giddy. Our other 5 were still plugging away so I am hopeful they will make it to the blastocyst for freezing. I spent yesterday on bed rest all day and today was up and about for brief intervals. A trip to target and a 10 minute walk down Abbott Kinney in Venice Beach for breakfast. Β  I am wrestling with the fact that I no longer have control of the situation (like I really ever did from the beginning). Β It’s all in God’s hands. I am just a vessel that is trying to make a comfortable home for my little embryo babies. I’ve found my mind veering off in to the fear of the “what if it doesn’t work”, “What if this”, “what if that” but have found that if I repeat my mantra’s “In it to twin it” and “year of the baby” it gets my head back in the right place. I already have mother’s guilt about everything! Please pray for me. It’s going to be a long two weeks! πŸ™‚


20 thoughts on “I Am A Vessel

  1. Hi! I followed you over from My Life as A Case Study! I have enjoyed reading up on your blog and I hope that you will find out that you are pregnant in a couple of weeks. I loved your comment that you “are a vessel”. And as I’ve been struggling with a lot lately myself, I like that you pointed out that we have no control. It would be so nice if we did, but nothing is left up to us. We’ll just screw it up. Better leave it to someone PERFECT to get it right, huh? I’m excited for you and hope for the very best for you!! I’m going to follow you and add you to my blogroll!

    Mel @ thereisahigherhope.blogspot.com

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